After slamming into the police escort tasked with shuttling the little Sasquatch through Florence, Italian authorities have revoked Snooki’s driver’s license. While producers roll around in a pile of dollar bills (money fight!), Ms. Polizzi not only put two cops in the hospital, she may face criminal charges. The police officers have 90 days to decide, and in the meantime are recuperating from injuries sustained from the crash according to UsWeekly.
Ish just got real! Snooki is in a neck brace and everything and she’s built like a mini orange tank. I’m picturing the cops in full traction, but supposedly they only suffered minor whiplash. If Snooki does have charges filed against her, she’d be forced to stand trial in Italy and turn into Amanda Knox II. Which just leaves one question, who would play Snooks in the Lifetime Original Movie??
Perpetually cranky supermodel, Naomi Campbell plans to sue Cadbury over what she deems a racist ad. After the ad ran in newspapers last week (ed: who reads newspapers anymore?), Campbell said, ”I am shocked. It’s upsetting to be described as chocolate, not just for me, but for all black women and black people. I do not find any humour in this. It is insulting and hurtful.”
She now plans to sue Cadbury and social groups are rallying for a boycott including Operation Black Vote. OBV’s Simon Woolley said that without an apology, the “only recourse black people have is not to buy its chocolate”.
A spokesperson for Cadbury insisted that the campaign was “a light-hearted take on the social pretensions of Cadbury Dairy Milk Bliss”. He added later, however, that the campaign was “no longer in circulation… we have no plans to repeat the campaign.”
Last week there was Justin Bieber grab assing on the beach in Maui on his no parents allowed vacation with Selena Gomez, this week there’s Suri Cruise rocking heels on the beach of the ‘bu. I spent yesterday at my friend’s parents’ pool in the valley. When did the world become this unfair?
At Joel Silver’s annual Memorial Day bash, we’re reminded that thousands of soldiers gave their lives so Hollywood’s elite could frolic in front of the paparazzi.
Saunter on over to Jezebel if you want to learn about why heels are bad for kids (in case common sense didn’t occur to you first), or just stay here and gaze at the questionable parenting and odd life that we get to ogle on a daily basis.
Image via Wenn.com
Oh, Snooki. Just weeks after Italy was up in arms over your (embarrassing) presence, you go and smash into a police escort. After seeing the stereotypically bad driving skills the Jersey Shore females on the relatively safe streets of the US, letting them drive in Italy seems to be the best/worst idea ever.
According to TMZ, authorities questioned Snooki (nee Nicole Polizzi) and Deena Cortese, but let them back onto the streets of Florence free of booze. Shocking considering these two must have a consistent BAL of 2.0. The policemen injured in the crash were taken away on stretchers (!) as a precaution for whiplash. Oh, those Italians… such drama queens.
After Sitch’ and Ronnie got into a bitch fight last week, this season is shaping up to be much better than last (aka the Ronnie and Sam Drama Hour). Let the count down begin!
Cross posted from Picktainment.com:
After an anti-climactic end to Episode 2 of Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 3 hints at more drama to come between the Guidices and the Gorgas. We start with the inevitable rehash of the snoozie confrontation between Kathy and Teresa, and Kathy’s husband playing the part ofThe Voice of Reason. Kathy laments the bad impression she made at the Brownstone, and now has to go about befriending Caroline after the embarrassing incident with Teresa.
Do I head a nasal voice in the second scene? Yes! Teresa is back shilling her cookbook. Taking a page from Real Housewives of New York alum and legitimate success, Bethany Frankel, Teresa sashays into a kitchen of chefs and a Terry Richardson look alike of a photographer (seriously, that mustache is freaking me out). After nitpicking photos of “her” recipes, Teresa announces a second book entitled, wait for it, Fabulicious. Get it? It’s fabulous AND delicious! In the same breath she drops two more gems, “ingrediences” and pronouncing cumin as “cummin’.”
In an unfortunate segue from “cummin’”/cumin, we learn that Joe get pissy if his wife doesn’t put out at his command. Lovely. She explains the lack of sex (a whole 3 days) is due to the fashion show stress, and it’s time for rehash #2 of the non-frontation. Looks like two things didn’t climax that night, am I right?
During moving day for the Manzo boys, Aunt Jacqueline, who in the previous scene paid a psychic to tell her everything we know, brings a stripper pole. Plus one for Auntie J! The bros settle in and discuss forgotten daughter Lauren’s plans to get engaged and move out. These people are so damn boring they had to bring in a long lost gay friend to add some fun. And a dog. Still boring. Jacqueline brings some spice to the clan with a dramatic past that clearly had an effect on her ne’er do well daughter, Ashley. Ergo, rather than blaming her spoiled spawn for her lack of worth ethic, Jacqueline cites a broken home for her issues. If I was born 5 years later, would I have zero accountability too?
In the theme of amend-making, Kathy comes bearing flowers at chez Manzo to try and smooth over the brief scuffle at The Brownstone. Rehash #3! Caroline says what’s on all our minds and blurts out, “I don’t care” while putting on The Voice of Reason hat and reminding Kathy that her issues with Teresa are her own.
From naked kids bathing at the Gorgas (ed. note: wrong), we’re back to a pouting Kathy disappointed…. until her husband surprises her with a brand new Benz in the driveway! Wounds are easily mended with hunks of German metal in the land of New Jersey. Oh and clothes, as Teresa, Jacqueline and Caroline remind us while ransacking a boutique in the city. Teresa gem #3, “I used to work in the fashion industry… I worked at Macy’s.” Priceless. Somewhere in the crowing there’s another rehash of the christening, and The Voice of Reason has to step in with Jacqueline taking up the solution caboose. C’mon ladies, listen to Caroline at all times!
Did Joe Gorga just equate lack of sex to popping a white head? I’ve never been so happy for a quick cut to commercial.
In the waning minutes of the show, Teresa and Jacqueline put their handful of braincells together to draft the letter to bro Joe with Jacqueline insisting Teresa bring up Melissa. Red flag! That woman is a bronzed landmine. Fast forward to a table full of discarded letters and an exhausted brain trust. Has anyone met a man that likes to read, let alone a diminutive man with a serious Napoleon complex? Joe immediately blows up at just the sight of the note (not a good sign), and the letter doesn’t seem to do much smoothing with the stubborn baboon bro. Melissa insists on a meeting, closing the show and setting up for a dramatic duel Thanksgiving showdown. Dun dun dun…
I honestly thought this Adrianne Curry and Christopher Knight broke up at least a year ago. I can’t be alone in this, right? Bucking the latest celeb trend of announcing their divorce in a terse paragraph, these fame whores went the drawn out route (via USWeekly):
“Actor Christopher Knight and his wife, model and television star Adrianne Curry have announced today on their five-year wedding anniversary that they are separating. After starting a relationship with what seemed to be irreconcilable differences, the couple has reached a period where those differences are no longer appreciated. The decision was mutually reached after it became clear to both that some perspective was needed in order to assess their unique union. Not unlike all marriages, work must be put in.
Obvious to both Knight and Curry was that their marriage would require more effort then a garden-variety relationship. They are taking time to see if they want to continue to put in that extraordinary effort. The couple has mutually determined that they are at a place where moving forward will require a step back. They still love one another but need some distance to consider their future.
Both Knight and Curry decided to release this joint announcement today in order to preempt any potential rumors and gossip and ask that their fans and the media respect their privacy during this delicate period.”
Their reality show(s?) from back in the day (aka just a few years ago) were mildly entertaining, if only because they were so obviously doomed for divorce. Adrianne (still my first and favorite ANTM alum) was meant for wilder pastures, not cooped up with an ex-child star.
Right… me too. Is it just me, or have Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez been in Hawaii for the last 6 months? I suppose they *have* to be on island for their own safety from the screaming mob of tweens (and let’s be real, grown ass women!).
I’m starting to get vibes of a young denim-clad Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears thing going here… yes, I refuse to leave the late 90s/early 00s, so leave me alone. Those times were beautiful and innocent I tell you. INNOCENT! There were no underaged ass grabs or lap sits.
Sigh.
Image courtesy Splash.
In the inevitable blind item denial dance, X-Men: First Class director Matthew Vaughn publicly poo-pooed whispers that he’s the father of January Jone’s ice baby. Vaughn spoke to semi-respectable entertainment news source, E! about the kerfuffle. End of story, right? Nay!
Apparently E! originally ran a story calling out Vaughn as the potential sperm contributor after he and his wife, Claudia Schiffer, scuttled back to England after having just rented a house in Beverly Hills. Hmmm… of course the reps deny the shadiness, saying it was time for the kids to return to school at the time Jones announced her pregnancy.
AND Vaughn was absent from the X-Men premier, siting “tonsillitis”… mmhmmm.
Image from E! Online.
I hope you’re not eating lunch, because visions of Chyna’s mutant mini-peen will haunt that hogie you’re about to nom on. Having faded into obscurity after her Playboy cover inexplicably became the best selling issue ever, everyone’s favorite early-oughts female wrestler is back in the spotlight thanks to Vivid.
The best/worst part is that her new film is called Backdoor into China, a sequel to her “leaked” sex tape from years ago. This time two legit porn stars will be joining our little Amazon, at Chyna’s request to Vivid’s Steve Hirsch. Lee and Evan Stone will have the honor of tag teaming the fading wrestling diva outside the ring and well past her prime.
Oh, porn… you never disappoint!
I’m not an uber feminist, but once a year EVERYONE starts talking about Danica Patrick, inevitably due to her locks and not her skills driving Formula 1 cars, and… ugh. But, you say, she’s a woman driving an Indy car, of course she’ll get press! Wrong. Plenty of women have driven in the Indy 500 , but few with such fan fare as Patrick.
Like every woman in sports, you get the biggest spotlight if you happen to have looks in addition to skill. Mia Hamm? Totally cute. Gretchen Blyler? Sexy snowboarder. Anna Kornakova? She wasn’t even that good! The gem of my half assed research has to be this article entitled, “25 Sexiest Athletes We Think We Could Outplay” complete with this lovely quote:
Every sports fan who has seen a field goal kicker miss an extra point or a golfer hit a five-foot putt wide has muttered to themselves, “Put me in there! I could do that!”
And of course, when it comes to female athletes, every guy in the back of their mind knows they could beat a girl, because at the core of every gentleman, we are sexist pigs.
Well at least they own it. This isn’t a Jezebel-eqsue rant, but I had to vent. So, that said, next time you ogle a hot skier in a bikini try to balance it out with watching a few youtube clips of her actually excelling at a sport, fully clothed.
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