How did I miss this?? The magical musical unicorn that is Stephani Germanotta once hoofed it onstage to her then new single “Just Dance” in front of a crowd of hundreds? Tens? I will admit she was cuter back then (I know, cliche long blonde hair and simple make-up), but maybe she finally woke up one day and realized that wearing next to nothing and smearing her face with eyeliner would really add to her whole performance art schtick… who knows.

Note: I’ll be out of the “office” today, but will try and post later. xoxo

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

Perpetually cranky supermodel, Naomi Campbell plans to sue Cadbury over what she deems a racist ad. After the ad ran in newspapers last week (ed: who reads newspapers anymore?), Campbell said, ”I am shocked. It’s upsetting to be described as chocolate, not just for me, but for all black women and black people. I do not find any humour in this. It is insulting and hurtful.”

She now plans to sue Cadbury and social groups are rallying for a boycott including Operation Black Vote. OBV’s Simon Woolley said that without an apology, the “only recourse black people have is not to buy its chocolate”.

A spokesperson for Cadbury insisted that the campaign was “a light-hearted take on the social pretensions of Cadbury Dairy Milk Bliss”. He added later, however, that the campaign was “no longer in circulation… we have no plans to repeat the campaign.”

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

Cross posted from Picktainment.com:

After an anti-climactic end to Episode 2 of Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 3 hints at more drama to come between the Guidices and the Gorgas. We start with the inevitable rehash of the snoozie confrontation between Kathy and Teresa, and Kathy’s husband playing the part ofThe Voice of Reason. Kathy laments the bad impression she made at the Brownstone, and now has to go about befriending Caroline after the embarrassing incident with Teresa.

Do I head a nasal voice in the second scene? Yes! Teresa is back shilling her cookbook. Taking a page from Real Housewives of New York alum and legitimate success, Bethany Frankel, Teresa sashays into a kitchen of chefs and a Terry Richardson look alike of a photographer (seriously, that mustache is freaking me out). After nitpicking photos of “her” recipes, Teresa announces a second book entitled, wait for it, Fabulicious. Get it? It’s fabulous AND delicious! In the same breath she drops two more gems, “ingrediences” and pronouncing cumin as “cummin’.”

In an unfortunate segue from “cummin’”/cumin, we learn that Joe get pissy if his wife doesn’t put out at his command. Lovely. She explains the lack of sex (a whole 3 days) is due to the fashion show stress, and it’s time for rehash #2 of the non-frontation. Looks like two things didn’t climax that night, am I right?

During moving day for the Manzo boys, Aunt Jacqueline, who in the previous scene paid a psychic to tell her everything we know, brings a stripper pole. Plus one for Auntie J! The bros settle in and discuss forgotten daughter Lauren’s plans to get engaged and move out. These people are so damn boring they had to bring in a long lost gay friend to add some fun. And a dog. Still boring. Jacqueline brings some spice to the clan with a dramatic past that clearly had an effect on her ne’er do well daughter, Ashley. Ergo, rather than blaming her spoiled spawn for her lack of worth ethic, Jacqueline cites a broken home for her issues. If I was born 5 years later, would I have zero accountability too?

In the theme of amend-making, Kathy comes bearing flowers at chez Manzo to try and smooth over the brief scuffle at The Brownstone. Rehash #3! Caroline says what’s on all our minds and blurts out, “I don’t care” while putting on The Voice of Reason hat and reminding Kathy that her issues with Teresa are her own.

From naked kids bathing at the Gorgas (ed. note: wrong), we’re back to a pouting Kathy disappointed…. until her husband surprises her with a brand new Benz in the driveway! Wounds are easily mended with hunks of German metal in the land of New Jersey. Oh and clothes, as Teresa, Jacqueline and Caroline remind us while ransacking a boutique in the city. Teresa gem #3, “I used to work in the fashion industry… I worked at Macy’s.” Priceless. Somewhere in the crowing there’s another rehash of the christening, and The Voice of Reason has to step in with Jacqueline taking up the solution caboose. C’mon ladies, listen to Caroline at all times!

Did Joe Gorga just equate lack of sex to popping a white head? I’ve never been so happy for a quick cut to commercial.

In the waning minutes of the show, Teresa and Jacqueline put their handful of braincells together to draft the letter to bro Joe with Jacqueline insisting Teresa bring up Melissa. Red flag! That woman is a bronzed landmine. Fast forward to a table full of discarded letters and an exhausted brain trust. Has anyone met a man that likes to read, let alone a diminutive man with a serious Napoleon complex? Joe immediately blows up at just the sight of the note (not a good sign), and the letter doesn’t seem to do much smoothing with the stubborn baboon bro. Melissa insists on a meeting, closing the show and setting up for a dramatic duel Thanksgiving showdown. Dun dun dun…

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

I’m not an uber feminist, but once a year EVERYONE starts talking about Danica Patrick, inevitably due to her locks and not her skills driving Formula 1 cars, and… ugh. But, you say, she’s a woman driving an Indy car, of course she’ll get press! Wrong. Plenty of women have driven in the Indy 500 , but few with such fan fare as Patrick.

Like every woman in sports, you get the biggest spotlight if you happen to have looks in addition to skill. Mia Hamm? Totally cute. Gretchen Blyler? Sexy snowboarder. Anna Kornakova? She wasn’t even that good! The gem of my half assed research has to be this article entitled, “25 Sexiest Athletes We Think We Could Outplay” complete with this lovely quote:

Every sports fan who has seen a field goal kicker miss an extra point or a golfer hit a five-foot putt wide has muttered to themselves, “Put me in there! I could do that!”

And of course, when it comes to female athletes, every guy in the back of their mind knows they could beat a girl, because at the core of every gentleman, we are sexist pigs.

Well at least they own it. This isn’t a Jezebel-eqsue rant, but I had to vent. So, that said, next time you ogle a hot skier in a bikini try to balance it out with watching a few youtube clips of her actually excelling at a sport, fully clothed.

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

It must get really boring talking about your boobs all the time, right? Especially when talking heads credit you with “bringing back curves” (did they get stuck in traffic on the 405?). But Hendricks perserveres, which is admirable when interviews tend to glaze over your own stellar acting and focus on their your ta-tas or your handsome leading men.

She tells Daily Mail, “I hope I’m not encouraging [breast augmentation],” she said. “If there’s anything to be learned from me it’s that I’m learning to celebrate what I was born with, even though it’s sometimes been inconvenient. Having larger breasts has made it harder for me to shop throughout the years, but I’ve learned to love it. It’s so bizarre that people are constantly asking if my breasts are real or fake. They’re so obviously real that anyone who’s ever seen or touched a breast would know.”

Alright we get it! She had big, natural, awesome breasts! Somewhere buried in the article we were reminded that Hendricks happens to be a main character on a wildly popular show saying it’s, “the first time I’ve felt appreciated, because it’s the first time I’ve been on a show that people have been so excited about.”

And as for the smoldering chain smoking misogynistic male characters on Mad Men? “Jon [Hamm] feels more of a brother to me, but listen, I’m a woman and I can look at that man and say he’s astoundingly talented and astoundingly attractive. But so are all the guys on the show. I mean John Slattery [who plays Roger Sterling, Joan's sometime lover] — he’s dashing and charismatic as can be.”

Hendricks is finally get some time on the big screen though, unfortunately starring Sarah Jessica Parker (I Don’t Know How She Does It), which means it’ll be a fluffy rom-com and I won’t see it. Too bad, so sad.

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

Truthfully, Dancing With the Stars gives me flashbacks to my crazy (and I mean CRAZY) old roommate. I’d come home and she’d be sitting in the living room, alone in the dark for 5 hours straight watching TV. She was a dozen cats and a wire hanger obsession away from full blown crazy.

Anywaaaay… Kirstie Alley continues to nomnom the (calorie free!) spotlight by losing more weight, claiming that they costume department had to take in her original Dancing dress in by a ridic’ 38 inches. As to the secret of her weight loss (wait, isn’t dancing your ass off- literally- not much of a secret?), Alley was mum.

Despite having less weight to throw around, her whiny partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy, tells AOL TV that this season has left him “drained.”

“I don’t know,” he shared. “It takes a lot out of you. When you invest that much of you into something that’s supposed to be just work you [can] get misinterpreted. I don’t know [if I'm coming back]. We’ll see. Right now, I’m drained.”

Image from Access Hollywood.

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

From my other jam, Picktaintainment.com

If you see one episode of Real Housewives of Anywhere, it has to be the Season 3 premiere of New Jersey and the epic baptism party showdown that will surely reverberate throughout the entire season. Episode 2 opens in the backyard of Jacqueline’s New Jersey McMansion on a pre-Halloween day, with Caroline Manzo (as usual) acting as therapist/voice of season/wizened matriarch to she-child Theresa as she attempts to shirk off any responsibility for the melee. Her oldest daughter, Gianna, barely 9 years old, looks on exhausted by her mother’s antics as the Manzos nod arms akimbo as Melissa lays the blame squarely on her hotheaded brother Joe. (Side note: isn’t it creepy her husband and brother have the same name?)
While the events of the christening are being rehashed starting at minute one, Caroline and Jacqueline suggest Theresa be the bigger person and seek out her brother to apologize, which oddly seems a difficult task since Theresa refuses to see Joe’s insufferable NJ princess archetype, Melissa. Ever the sense-talker, Caroline reminds Theresa (without actually saying it) that they are in fact, a cast, and actually have to do things together i.e. the Posche fashion show. Theresa’s solution when she sees her sister-in-law? Hide.

New cast member Kathy invites Melissa and Joe over for dinner, and we get their side of the story. Melissa again calls out Theresa for being “fakey” (cough kettle/black cough), insisting the spotlight never should have been taken off of her at the party. By the time Theresa said congratulations, Joe had consumed more than his limit of libations, and lashed out at his sister. His excuse? He was hurt. Is that a new term for drunk and Italian? He elaborates saying he’s been continually hurt by his brother-in-law (the other Joe), claiming “verbal abuse” for the past nine years and saying it’s destroyed the relationship with both Theresa and their father. Past drama aside, male voice of reason in the form of Kathy’s kookie husband brings up the fashion show like it’s a royal coronation, and the feuding Gorgas/Guidices must meet. Dramatic fade out.

Oh, it’s time for FUR! Posche boutique’s dual team of botoxed owners“surprise” Melissa with a modeling opportunity at their fashion show. Kim G saunters in, reprising her role as s— stirrer that she played so well with Danielle’s crazy last year. Quote of the year: saying Theresa has a “crooked ass.” Gold! From clothes to make-up with get caught up with the too happy/normal/successful Manzo’s and their lone daughter, Lauren. Seriously, where’s the fun without a foreclosure or broken wine glass? It’s a welcome respite, albeit brief, watching Lauren give her mom a makeover and again, build up to the fashion show where Lauren is doing the makeup and their event venue, The Brownstone will be the setting. See- everyone’s playing a part!

Flash to Halloween in New Jersey and cheesy costumes, hideous interior decorating and Joe Gorga’s freakishly smooth back in a Snooki costume and his wife (naturally) whored up in a skin tight latex cat costume. The Guidices, who somehow still have their house and Tuscan vomit furniture, host a kids’ party and lament the absence of bro Joe while the Gorgas party with the grownups complete with party bus and northern Jersey night club. More fashion show talk/build-up, demands for apology, etc. and Kathy settles into her role in the crazy eye family as having to play both sides.

Finally! Fashion show day. The Manzos, ever the lone enduring success, work hard to set up the show. Hard work. On the Real Housewives! Who knew? Flash sideways to Theresa and Jacqueline, again, discussing the inevitable confrontation that evening and Theresa decides to say hello to Melissa. Jaqueline’s brain hamster starts spinning and she realizes that Therea’s “hello” means fisticuffs. Smart lady. Sideways flash #2 to Kathy and Melissa getting their hair done, more demands for apology.  More hairspray. I’m getting woozy.

Theresa wisely gets the hello out of the way early, and Melissa bereft of apology, grows ever more stick-up-assy. More hair, more makeup. More sequins, more leopard. THIS is a fashion show, people! Screw Milan and Paris. Sitting at opposite ends of the room, we see Melissa’s harpy-like sisters shoot daggers at Theresa. The battle gauntlet has been thrown, ladies! The drunken Posche blondes work the room, and Theresa swells with envy whenever someone talks to the harpies before finally skulking away to change for the runway show. Platforms! Feathers! Minis! Melissa works the catwalk like a Barbazon graduate workin’ for her veneers while Theresa follows to a quieted audience. Great dress, though.

Backstage Jacqueline provides the timebomb tick as a fur-ensconced Kathy drags Theresa off to the side, the latter protesting her fault and placing the blame squarely on bro Joe for the christening fallout. Kathy again cries, “someone PLEASE think of the children” accusing Theresa of abandoning her kids during the fight. Where they at a McDonald’s in the ghetto? Weak! Melissa contributes a disappointing lack of drama and mama bear Caroline shuts her and Kathy down, saving her family from further embarrassment (ha), and ending the episode on a dull decrescendo. They better step it up for Episode 3, or my drinking game will cease to be fun.

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

From LAgeekly.com:

Do you have what it takes to be among the bible elite?  Will you get to partake in the rapture this Saturday or will you watch from the sidelines at one of the many Post Rapture parties here in Los Angeles and around the world?  Follow through this helpful flowchart to determine if you will stay or if you will float!

I know for damn sure without even looking at this chart I will be staying behind here in heathen LA.  I can’t help but think how the rapture could be an AMAZING thing for this world.  If all the people who followed their religions to the letter would just disappear…

Oh well, I guess LA is close enough.

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

I’m trying to decide if Gigolos (Showtime) is this is the worst show ever, or the best worst show ever… I mean really, what are the criteria? The obvious fake-ness puts similar sexy-time shows like Cathouse to shame, and the seemingly impossible premise (5 strictly “straight” men working simultaneously in Las Vegas, servicing solely women??) make the show so eye-rollingly bad that I HAVE to watch every episode.

For starters, just about female “client” has been outed by one outlet or another as a legitimate adult film star, and perhaps for the best. Would a “teacher” really openly admit she’s seeking paid male companionship? The taboo admission would surely be a career ruiner. But you can’t fault Gigolos for it’s faux clientele alone, it’s the general d-bagginess of the cast that grates more than the awkward, grunting sex scenes. I mean, one of them raps? A majority are openly against any act that could be perceived as gay? Please!

I can’t even keep them all straight (pun intended!), save for alpha douche Brace, who vocally turned on an orgy-like situation with a female client due to his severe aversion to any peen other than his own. Is there really that big a market for supplements that you can turn down gigs that involve another phallus?

Sigh. Venting aside, I’ll still watch this show despite its rank well below Cathouse and Secret Diary of a Call Girl, but slightly above Skinamax… I mean, what else is a girl supposed to watch on a Saturday night in?

Bookmark It

Hide Sites

He says, ”There is no heaven or afterlife for broken-down computers; that is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark.”

In “Grand Design,” a book published last year, Hawking had declared that it was “not necessary to invoke God … to get the universe going.”

Hawking notes that he is not afraid of death, but adds: “I’m in no hurry to die. I have so much I want to do first.”

It’s interesting, especially when considering the advancement of science, that there’s been such a low tech backlash promoting Christian fundamentalism especially. Did anyone really believe that in the middle of 2011 we’d be talking about rapture and judgement days? Ugh.

From LAGeekly.

Bookmark It

Hide Sites